It’s no surprise that each year, Valentine’s Day focuses on love, romance and affection. It’s a time where people around the world try and find the perfect gift in the form of flowers, tasty chocolates and sparkling jewellery. But this year instead of focussing on romantic love, focus on the art of loving. Research suggests you can be happier, physically healthier, live longer and have fewer mental health problems by building connections with your family, friends, neighbours and community. Relationships are one of the most important aspects of our lives yet most of us complain about them and our approach to building and maintaining them is passive.Read More
Many of us are searching on the outside for something found only inside ourselves. We believe we have to work hard to attract or maintain a relationship because they will bring us the joy we so desperately seek. The truth is, all we need is found within us. We have to become the person we want to be in order to be in the relationship we have always dreamt. This new year take your inner work more seriously and watch as your outer world begins to take care of itself.
Follow these five steps if you want to attract a healthy intimate relationship in 2019.Read More
Christmas shopping may be something you dread because your choice of gift reveals something about you. Your choice of gift can show up how much or little you know about the person you are buying for, the kind of relationship you have with them, your relationship with money and finally, they can make public your taste. For example joke gifts should be given with caution as they may be received as that one hint too many and not funny. “Suitable” gifts such as alcohol or food are devoid of emotion and can make perfect gifts to those you have a professional relationship with…Read More
Some time has passed and your ex is but a far distant memory. They are no longer in contact with you but you know all it takes is a small amount of social media stalking and you will be brought right back to where you two left off. And that’s exactly where you bring yourself, only to discover they have a shiny new life and a new partner. They have moved on, before you? You imagine how wonderful life must be for them, you envisage the new partner with angelic qualities ‘putting up’ with all the neediness, temper tantrums and drama. If they can put up with the world of one, you ask yourself why you couldn’tRead More
Do you recognise any of the following unhealthy behaviours in your relationship? Consider how each one makes YOU feel.
Decisions are made for you without consulting you
There is no consideration for your feelings unless it serves your partner in some way
You feel as though your partner is not always telling you the truth or you have evidence to suggest you are being lied to
You are “punished” for having an opinion your partner disagrees with. Oftentimes your punishment may be the silent treatment
Healthy, supportive relationships are one of the best predictors of emotional and physical health. Yet, not everyone is aware of the importance of only allowing healthy love into one’s life. Growing up in a society obsessed with the idea of romantic love, so many people overlook red flag behaviours in the rush to partner with someone without ever considering the health of their partnership. Whether you are currently dating or in an unhealthy relationship this three-part series will create awareness regarding unhealthy behaviours so hopefully you can avoid entering into relationships that are deeply damaging or manage your way out of one with specialist support.Read More
The love you have for yourself is inextricably intertwined with the love you have for others. Which means, how you regularly take care of yourself can reflect the type of love you offer others. Is your love needy and greedy or is it selfless and unconditional? Loving selflessly sounds wonderful in theory but emotional maturity doesn’t always lend itself to dating and relationships. Imagine those moments when you default back to your learned patterns of childhood behaviour (e.g. avoiding, blaming, seeking approval, “punishing”), how do these habits show up now in your adult self and are these loving ways of behaving towards yourself or another person? These behaviours may be learned ways of coping or…Read More
Do you ever wonder why the same formula you relied on for achieving success in your career does not apply to finding and securing a healthy intimate relationship? When you think of the effort you applied to achieve your career goals you probably think of doing, performing or accomplishing. In my work as a singles relationship coach I empower individuals to lose the traditional mind-set that you must do to achieve. It is not about changing who you are on the outside, it is about understanding who you are on the inside and finding out what is holding you back from attracting and maintaining that healthy intimate relationship you truly deserve. My work centres round preparing you for the…Read More
“Have you thought of joining a group?” A tried and tested question asked of disillusioned singles everywhere. One of my single friends and I jokingly ask it to each other anytime we feel like the only despairing singles in the village. Yet, this clichéd question holds merit, a group provides social connectedness and can support the rapidly changing landscape of friendships in your thirties or forties. Some of my clients associate being single with being lonely yet the two are not mutually exclusive. It can be difficult to make the distinction between being single and loneliness because such dramatic lifestyle changes can occur to impact your friendships from your twenties to your thirties…Read More
Do you ever wonder why you continue to attract the same types of partners? Or, is the same problem showing up in all your intimate relationships? So many people claim they are “bad at relationships” but the question they need to ask themselves is, what attempts are they making to tend to them? It’s fair to say I am bad at long distance running because I have never brought awareness to why I keep getting injured at the six-mile stage to change some of the bad habits I have picked up over the years. The same is also true for intimate relationships, until you develop a loving relationship with yourself and pay attention to what is going on beyond the superficial, you will unfortunately continue to repeat these same…Read More